he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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