Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
