I'm laying in your front yard are you home
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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