Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
