Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
