Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
