We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
