So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize