Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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