you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The feeling are messing with the penis
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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