It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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