a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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