So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
