doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize