i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
