you're like a bully in the Christmas story
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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