is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
