I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Randomize
