im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
