fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just found puke in my bra..
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
