So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
