Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Randomize