She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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