I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
