Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
