Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
