ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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