he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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