is your mom at the bar?
Plan B is the new Plan A
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
