He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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