its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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