trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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