I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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