Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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