Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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