these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
