Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
