Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Randomize
