Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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