What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize