there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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