theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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