she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
