I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
