Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
