Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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