Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
