Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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