just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
