weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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